Stan Smith, Fashionista
Stan Smith is trending. In fashion, not tennis.
Man Repeller revisits the 1970s sneakers, as well as cuffed, stiff denim jeans, in a recent post.
I love the look, especially the floppy black bow. The little square handbag is super-cute, too, but I am of a certain age where I need too many "essentials" to warrant something that small.
Like dental floss. I have a crown that sits so high above my gum line that a mouthful of steak can hide behind it. I feel like a chipmunk, packing her cheek bags for the lean season. Or Handiwipes. Where would I put those in that bag? Or my iPad, for that matter? How would I ever read The New York Times on the A train? I refuse to go back to the origami-folding maneuvers required by the newspaper. It's so last century.
Man Repeller isn't the only fashionista sporting Stans. Elle wrote about the all-white, go-with-everything flat-soled shoes.
Author Danielle Prescod went out into a snow storm to buy pairs in every color, inspired by the tennis shoe chic of designer Phoebe Philo, who was breathlessly deemed by fashion blog Into The Gloss as "the coolest woman ever."
Smith's kicks are also style-worthy enough to be mentioned by French rappers. Lunatic, in "H.L.M. 3," sings about training in his "Stan Smith blanches." (That's "white Stan Smiths," Haters.) The song's got a pretty catchy hook, even though I don't understand a single word. Then again, even in English, I don't understand most rap.
All this cooing about Stan Smiths has Tennis Hate melting my brain like last month's heat wave at the Australian Open. That's because these women are unabashedly unathletic. They wear the shoes ironically. Prescod initially overlooked the sneakers because she didn't want to "revisit the ghosts of my very unathletic past," but swiftly moved from denial to acceptance in order to get that "carefree-girl-in-her-twenties" look.
Man Repeller redeems herself somewhat by acknowledging from the get-go that "There is something distinctly phony about wearing a pair of shoes named after a man whose name you have heretofore never heard." But she declares herself exempt from such judgment because her mom did it first:
My mom spent the greater portion of the 90s not playing tennis but wearing the tennis sneakers, named after the famed tennis player, with effectively everything.
Yes, blame Mom.
I'm also pissed because, Haters, I had these shoes about six years ago. I was cool way before Phoebe Philo. It's just that no one knew it.
Wait till Philo and her fashion house, Celine, get wind of my black sports socks and red Adidas pairing. She's still got time to incorporate it into her 2015 Spring Collection.